So now I’m feeling a little bit better, but still iffy.
The boyfriend let me nap at his place before heading home yesterday, which really helped. I slept for about an hour after almost getting into an accident because I was so dizzy. We went to the store and he bought me some ginger root pills, which are not only supposed to help with motion sickness but with arthritis too. It seems to be helping, so I’m excited about that.
I also decided to start taking my vitamins again. Hopefully, I’ll stick to it this time.
I don’t normally like to talk about this, but in the past I’ve had problems with what I’m sure is anorexia. I used to run a lot (10-20 miles a day), eating nothing but some crackers with peanut butter. My latest dizzy spell business, I feel, only helps to highlight that I still struggle with that today.
I will admit, I have not been eating a lot. It just took me three hours to eat a 5-inch sub sammich. I’m at work, so that is part of it, but I’m also just not hungry. The arthritis really does a number on my digestive system, and often things are swollen to a point that I just am not hungry.
I will also admit that, subconsciously, I’ve been fine with going hungry because I am losing weight… even though I tell others to refrain from that same practice because of how dangerous and ineffective it is. I’m happy with things in my life, but I’m not as able to exercise as others because of the RA too.
Stupid RA.
Anorexia, tough subject. You must realize the root word to fully understand what is going on in your body with Stills (I suggest dictionary.com).
There is a difference between what you seemed to have in your past, a body dysmorphic type of anorexia, where one refuses to eat even if hungry for fear of gaining weight (a very real psychological condition), and chronic illness induced anorexia, where an illness prevents one from eating due to a lack of being hungry, or even feeling sick to your stomach (more of a physiological condition).
When I was first diagnosed with Stills, I had lost over 50 pounds without thought, just because I wasn't hungry, especially when flaring. This is a common part of the disease, even referred to, you guessed it, anorexia. It is a real part of the disease, often used as part of the diagnosis panel.
I wouldn't worry too much. If you are losing too much weight, talk to your doctor for an anti nausea medication. Unfortunately this is all part of our lives from this point on.